Wednesday, May 11, 2011

Black-RUDE-Berrys & Too Much CLEAVAGE

I'll begin this entry with a familar scene we are all encountering daily.

Let me take you with me to the post office last week. I go in with a giant box ( inside a beautiful antique still life), heading to Malta ( the box,  not me ), and I go stand in the obligatory long line at the main post office. I lean my box against the railing, smile in the direction of the man in front of me, and park myself there until I have to scoot up.
Above is what I see. He is engrossed in his device. Then a young woman walks up behind me, I say , hello...she acknowledges me, but quickly whips out her I-RUDE-phone and starts pressing buttons.
Pretty soon the line is about 20 + people long, and about 1/2 or more are dabbling with these devices.
I-am-a RUDE-pod
Our entire society is consumed by displaying either how busy they are, how popular they are by the messages they receive, or how much money they have by the price of their electronic devices. I am not Miss Chatty-Kathy out in public, but it has gotten almost rare to have somone acknowledge with a simple hello , or even a nod of the head , when we stand in lines, go out shopping, even walking the neighborhood I see people ,even mothers with strollers...checking their phones and texting !What about talking to your baby about the birds and the trees and the trash truck roaring by? I also am amazed how many parenst have these at the kid's baseball games. Checking whatever the heck is more important than their little Junior playing ball. Conversing with whomever is more important than the real flesh and blood person on both sides of them on the bleachers.
I used to have a Blackberry , I now just have a little regular phone. I do not chat on it in lines anywhere , I do not chat on it while a store clerk rings up something for me. I have considered getting another one for when I go out of town to be able to check my eBay site, but am considering the downside of the cost, and the temptation to spend too much time checking online.
I believe no one has a clue how much of a blessing they can be to someone standing in line next to them, not blah-blah on and on, but for Pete's sake people--we can at least put down, or leave in our purse or pocket, or holster, or car, our personal phones, blackberrys, smart phones, etc., and acknowledge someone's presence in this world !! on to too much cleavage. I bet you thought I was going to tell you a story about a woman with too much cleavage talking on a blackberry.
Wrong, but it has definitely been sighted by someone before I can wager that.
Real Housewifes of LA ' stars', all of these women are 40's-50's

Instead I want to rant a bit about another pervasive social sighting I keep encountering.
Women, young and old, showing WAYYYYY too much cleavage out in public. I am more upset with the older woman than the younger, but both sets need to stop allowing their  'assets' to take center stage in public. I am using the term assets very loosely here, but I have been seeing women in their late 30's-50's crowd , showing enough of their breasts that they look like hookers. I know that is harsh and mean to say, but seriously, there used to be a difference in the way women dressed. Prostitutes were known for  wearing very low-cut,very short dresses and very high heels attire. Unfortunately, that is how many young women ( and older women ), dress today to go on a regular date or to a special occasion and sometimes church . A group of beautiful women, heading out the door dressed to be very 
 hot-sexy ', and not really revealing how beautiful they are at all.
I used to fuss , many times, at my youngest daughter to dress showing less cleavage, not such super short skirts. She used to say that is what is in style.
I tried to explain to her that revealing what she and her friends like to reveal so much only attracts men who want one thing. 
And you men know that...but it is now accepted by men that their daughter's ,  daughter's friends, or wives, dress like this and it appears to amuse and even tittilate many of you.
Protectors of women are few and far between these days.You need to put your foot down and say ' Hold on , what are you wearing, or not wearing  , out the door today ?" Parents need to express their disapproval , but I find many parents just accept this.  I know it is very hard to do this, all the girls want to be so darned sexy all the time.

Almost through with this rant, so bear with me.
Getting to the older woman that reveal too much, I also don't want to hear the excuse that you are just big-busted and you can't find clothes that cover you up completely.

I saw a beautiful woman, early 40's the other day at the the UPS shipping store, push-up bra, low -cut camisole shirt, leaning over filling out forms...showing any and all men , and women around her everything she wanted to show. I think most of us know that if a woman dresses like this, she wants tons of attention.
And men gladly give it to her, which in turn makes her do it more. I wanted to walk up to her and say, " Do you know you are so gorgeous, but revealing 3/4ths of your bust to all of us , and the entire world, makes you less attractive ? "

Women, mothers , need to set an example and not dress like you are 25 out looking for a man in a bar ( if you are reading this and your are 25 and about to go out to a bar dressed like that, since I am Mom I would love to stop you ). Gee-whiz women , we need to show some difference in what the world is displaying as beautiful, the porn-star/LA -too-much-cleavage-wives/streetwalker look , and dress with a semblence of class. We need to treasure ourselves.
I always told my daughter Sarah, if you are big-busted, you can tell in anything you wear, like a man who is well-built and muscular. You can tell it in anything he wears usually. You don't need to hike it up ( I say that as my 25 year old son heard me ranting about this one day and he told me ALL young women wear padded-push-up bras these days to try to look as busty as possible), and put them out for the world to see all the time. 
Whew, I'm exhausted from all this fussing at cleavage.

I think what is so attractive is a man that is NOT carrying a blackberry everywhere and a woman who is dressed with some modesty , not frumpy/fuddy-duddy...just leaving parts of her body covered to show she respects herself , and respects people around her.

Be blessing out there , with your presence ( and put down your electronic device and get a higher cut blouse ) ,


  1. Gina, I missed you SO much! And after reading THIS post, I know why. Our hearts and concerns are quite in sync. Kudos for your honest and well-stated observations.

    We recently weighed the pros and cons of "smart phones" when our 2 year contract was renewable and decided to stick with the basics.

    Enjoying a warm spring day. The sunshine today should bring the lilacs to full bloom. I can't wait to cut a few and enjoy the fragrance inside as well as out!

  2. Gina, you had me giggling a few times in between agreeing with you 100%! So many times I've wanted to say, 'Put down the phone and cover up, nobody wants to see that.' I lived the first 50 years of my life without a cellphone, gasp, without having to be in constant contact with the world. How did I survive? You're so right, it's sad to see a bunch of people on the phone/texting while they are in the presence of other human beings they could reach out and touch. What's next, phone implants (along with the 'other' implants?) Oh, I hope not. Loved this post!

  3. i am so with you on these two things! makes me feel old to see how little parents these days seem to care what their young girls wear to church. i just dont get it.

  4. I totally agree with you about standards of dress. Reading this, I remembered an episode of Night Court from years ago. A client and his colleagues from a middle east country were in court and the female lawyer was dressed in her well-cut modest suit. The men thrilled to see her covered so and begged her to put on more, including a jacket.... anyway, the jist of it is, the more the sexier.

    My daughter was taught from the time she was little to dress modestly and still does now that she is an adult. Parents need to be parents, not just friends, and set the standards that are appropriate.

  5. Amen. How about stomach cleavage? How about these overweight women (and men I suppose), who wear these tight belly shirts and let it hang out? How about some modesty there..The phone thing I agree with, and they call that being social as in network. Have you tried to get this younger generation just to enjoy a "quiet" time of solitude just to think, meditate and enjoy God's creation..not..

  6. Nice to read a post from you Gina. We do need to put those devices down. You never know when someone needs just a few kind words and a smile from a total stranger to light up thier day. I know I could have used one a few times. Modesty is under rated. I have been mortified at the way girls dress even for church and I'm no prude.

  7. Dearest Gina ~ How good to read a post from you again. I have missed you, and your inspiring words.

    We do not have cell phones or the latest carry with you/keep connected gadgets and we don't plan on getting them either. We are always amazed seeing how many people are addicted to these divices, old, young, rich, poor. We don't even see how people can afford all the expenses that go with these things.

    Modesty is almost a thing of the past. That picture of those older women is horrible in my book. Who are they trying to kid?

    The world says one thing and it's hipper to go along rather than being a little weird, strange or oddball. People want to go along with crowds. They want to live the way they want to live and don't want advice.

    They don't want to walk a path that is filled with love, peace and joy. A path walking and talking with our Great Creator God. That's old-fashioned, not modern.

    We all have to learn our own lessons, whether we are young or old. We go through life, make mistakes and hopefully learn and grow into better humans.

    Love and hugs to you Gina ~ FlowerLady

  8. I just became your newest follower! I found you through my sister Mel's blog.(upnorthwithmel) But when I read your entry it was as if I could have written it. I TOTALLY agree with you about the rudeness of people, the lack of self respect let alone respect for others and too much cleavage hanging out there!! GREAAT ENTRY!
    'hugs from afar'

  9. Amen! Glad to see you're back...

  10. Another Amen - and glad to see you back!

  11. You've highlighted two relevant issues here, Gina and it's clear you're passionate about both. What a great way to reclaim your blog authorship...with guns blazing ;) We have ALL missed you and it's wonderful to have you back!!!

  12. Agree, agree, agree!!!!! On the "devices" and immodest dress! I'll AMEN this post as well!

  13. i completely agree with everything you said!!! in the picture of those "housewives", they look like barbie doll clowns.....i think they look ridiculus and weird! don't even get me started on the terribly high heels gals are wearing......they can barely walk (or god forbid, FLEE if needed). i was so upset recently when i spotted training bras that were push-up style and padded! at target of all places! great post.


  14. Hi Gina,
    I agree with you entirely about the mobile phone idiots. I have one, and am constantly telling customers that they can't have my number for emergencies (quite what sort of emergency can require a gardener I don't know!).
    I was in Soho bar with Amanda yesterday, and we witnessed a guy collecting his pizza order from the food bar. He queried something with the chef, and instead of walking to the other end of the bar to check with his wife, he phoned her instead....crazy!! As for too much cleavage, I generally agree with you, but am a geezer nonetheless. Take care.

  15. These Rude-Gadgets need new names too.

  16. I feel the same way as you do about the cleavage. Sometimes in the grocery store there may be a pregnant woman with half the belly showing and belly button sticking out with a low cut top to boot. What makes one think that this is pleasant to look at in line checking out purchases. Some are downright vulgar for especially children to see.
    The blackberry or cell phones - you are right on.

  17. Gina, I agree with you whole-heartedly about people being rude as they concentrate on their cell phone conversations and their Blackberries. A simple hi and a smile from them might bless someone, since we may all "entertain an angel unawares", or in their case, snub an angel.
    You are right about modest dressing too!
    Love ya, Terra

  18. Hi Gina! I'm just checking up on you ;) Do so hope you're 'doing OK'?
    Des xoxo

  19. Gina,
    I just wanted to touch base and let you know you're in my thoughts and prayers during this difficult time of year.

  20. gina, just thought i would stop by and say hello. i miss reading your posts. hope youre having a good summer. ~ daricia

  21. My thoughts are with you as the 12th of July approaches, Gina. I realise that this is a particularly difficult time for you and wanted you to know we haven't forgotten the significance either. Through you, Sarah touched all of our hearts. Sending you heartfelt hugs. XO

  22. Gina - as a younger woman, I agree with you completely on both accounts. There is a time and place for everything, and it is NOT all the time and every place.

    And just like you, I traded in my blackberry for a regular phone after I determined that I was wasting life checking that thing for reasons I didn't understand. I just don't need to know that immediately 99% of the time!

    And finally, I echo daricia, who must be on my same brainwave and just wondering how you were doing and saying hi :)

  23. Hi Gina - Just wanted you to know I am thinking of you. It is July now and you are on my mind. Prayers for you this weekend.

  24. Am missing you dear Gina. Love, hugs and prayers to you and your family.


  25. Hey girl, I got a good laugh or two from this post. I agree, phones are taking over the world. Love the bit on cleavage. You know, they say; "if you've got it then flaunt it." Question is, I never did really know who they was. Never was comfortable flaunting it when I had it. And now, everything has just gone South. Who'd want to see it anyway. Ha-ha! Thanks so much for your cute comment on my blog. Love that you have a blooming drive way. Made me smile!


I love comments , please leave one if you like. I try to respond to comments,but if I'm running behind, please know that I read each one before they are published. Thanks much, Gina