Sarah's Dream

I am a big dreamer, I dream all the time. Quite disconcerting and disruptive for quality of sleep time I can tell you.

But this post is about a dream that Sarah told me she had, about a month after her grandmother, my mother...whom Sarah was named after, died.  The two Sarahs in our family. It was another tragic part of our lives, my Mother had just turned 65, was planning on a big to-do Bridal shower for my oldest daughter, worked too hard in her garden areas...and died of a heart attack on a Saturday afternoon. 3 weeks before my oldest daughter's wedding, and right after her 49th wedding anniversary, she had just retired to spend more time with my Dad. She missed many big events of her life. We were all in shock, and Sarah was as devastated as us all, if not more.

The picture above is my two beautiful daughters at a Mother's day lunch for me a few months before her car crash. Bliss for me, I love to just look at my children, and enjoy their presence. Sarah is to the right.

Let me tell you the dream she had. She called me about a month after my Mother's death, and said she had a dream last night about Sazie. The grandkids all called her Sazie, a nickname her grandfather gave her as a child. Again, my mother's name was Sarah too.

I eagerly, yet also nervously , asked Sarah, what was her dream about ? I was feeling both emotions, as I was pretty tender inside over my mother's death, and did not want some weird/freaky dream about her to be related to me by my daughter.

Instead...this is what she told me..

She said that she was walking near a very large gate, with a large garden on the other side. She looked through the gate, or the gate door was open, I can't recall exactly...and she saw my mother , kneeling and tending a garden there. Sarah then said, Sazie jumped up, put her hands on her hips ( a family trait we share ), and said to Sarah , " Now what are you doing here ?" 

I then interrupted Sarah and asked, " What did she look like ?"

Sarah told me she looked younger, she had her hair up, my mother did not wear her hair up hardly ever ( except working outside in the Summer ), that she did not have her glasses on, and that she had a flowered shirt on and shorts. My mother never, ever wore shorts.

Sarah then said, " Oh,  and she looked really happy."

I remember crying hearing this, and then I asked Sarah, " Anything else ?" 

And Sarah told me she walked into the garden, through the gate, towards her grandmother.

And that was it.

After Sarah died last July, and after a few months of my mind in complete numbness...I recalled that conversation. I now view it as prophetic , and I believe where Sarah entered through the large gate, was Heaven. I dream and envision my Sarah running, like the wind up there. No sore feet from working long shifts as a waitress and running here on Earth with her friends for miles.

Running barefoot , running for miles, very happy on soft dirt roads.

I see her in my mind, running..and also holding babies and laughing and smiling at them. Those are the two activities I see her doing the most, in Heaven.

She was a bright, bright light in my life, and I miss her always, and continually.

Here is a song I heard in church today, one of my favorites.

Enjoy, and dream...

Gina

NEAT Ideas for Antique STAINED Glass Windows

We have always had antique stained glass windows in our homes. I am usually the pick-it-out and tell-him-where -I- want- it window person...while my husband is the do-all-the-work window person. He usally claims all the credit once it is placed somewhere. I figure he deserves about 75-85 % of the credit for all the work . The window above is an antique sunburst window, that he placed in an upstairs bath. I am missing my regular window here, so am trying to talk him in to putting this one somewhere else. I would like to have a regular window to see out into my garden below.

This is how it looks in the early morning, or later at night. Antique windows are a wonderful accent in any room.

Here is one where he busted through a wall, and simply added more light into a bedroom by installing an antique window. He says you have to make sure the electrical is not in the way, working without load-bearing beams or studs in the way is also helpful. But he can work around those and reframe the area before he puts in the window. All the windows he cleans up and builds a frame around, and then  makes a support frame in the wall...and there you have my bright idea.

Oh...and all his hard work.

The view at night.

Here is one of my favorites. I wanted some more light in the upstairs bedroom, and of course , there was no where to put a regular window...but I saw a nice spot in a wall...and my husband put this here for me. I like to have mirrors to reflect views, and views of stained glass windows in walls are unique.

Plus...

You get a view coming and going...from both sides.

We almost always buy the dimpled stained glass windows for the inside walls, to afford privacy still.

We have a very large one downstairs, about 4+ feet tall that was used to replace a very ugly view into a brick wall that used to be here. These old houses had garages built directly to the side, and so when you look out you just saw brick.

Not anymore.

Lots more light. Really like this one. Mr. Do- all -the work , worked hard to replace the other windows with this. Often, if you are replacing outside windows, you will need a brick mason to come repair your wall from the outside afterwards, if your home is brick.

My small stained glass window I move up and down ( there is a hook at center too ), to be able to see my garden outside. If you look to the far right you can see my windows on my outside brick wall.

You can hang windows on brick walls too.

You have to use a masonry bit to drill through the brick or mortar though. You can't just nail a big nail into a brick. Learned that the hard way. I think my hand vibrated for two hours after bending 4 or 5 nails a few times.

A large one for a back picture window , that is out towards the back garden. He hangs all these with eye hooks and chain or just one eyehook into another hook.

I also like to mix and match the windows , instead of draperies or blinds. Make a tier of stained glass windows. I'm not a perfect matchy-matchy woman anyway in decorating.

This one has the eyehook and hook holding it up. The one below has the eyehook and chain.

One we bought to put in a downstairs bath to replace regular window. Now what do I spy in the window ?

A snake and animal sponges courtesy of my 10 year old. I left them there, one day I will have a house without any rubber snakes to surprise me...I need to enjoy them while I can.

This was one he fussed and told me would never work, I didn't want to know how he was going to do it, just thought it would look cool up in the brick instead of the unattractive wood slat vent that was there. I think he fussed for about 3-4 months before he made it work.

Now he claims the idea was his . He put a light in the attic to show it off at night but I always forget to turn it on. I'm more the one walking around turning off any extra lights anywhere.

That's my excuse.

Beautiful one in my eBay room . It is not totally finished , mainly because my husband can no longer reach it with all my stuff in here. I will not show you a wide shot of the surroundings or you would never read my blog again.

It is a great light giver to the room, and furthermore ' gives ' light to the adjoining room.

That is what is so special about adding stained glass to your walls, or your windows.

Brighter ...lighter.

I am working on my husband to put another one in a wall upstairs.  Typically takes me 4-7 months of asking before he does it.

I have to have lots of natural light in my surroundings, a must for my psyche.

Have a good one ,

Gina

Latest VINTAGE & Antique paintings I have for SALE:

Going to show you a few of the antique and vintage paitings I have for sale, with a few thrown in that are sold--but I really like them so much I want to show them to you anyway. The one above is a antique early 1800's oil on wood panel, European , Dante and Beatrice-and I believe it is a Italian painting. Look at her eyes below...

She is listed in eBay now, you can find here here.

I found her in Charleston, SC a few weeks ago...and I also found this unusual, interesting- looking gentleman

below...

He caught my attention right away, plus his frame, in a fancy-schmancey antique mall in Charleston...and I made an offer , and after some haggling it was accepted. It is a large very old, early 1800's or before, Old Master's style oil on canvas in a killer Renaissance style HEAVY antique frame. Here's a close-up..

Isn't he something ? Long hair ,intelligent gaze , a true find for antique portrait collectors.  He can be found here.

This 1940-50's geisha portrait is SOLD.

This was a really neat find, a view of Charleston , SC , a vintage painting circa 1960's...a view from St. John's Island, right outside of Charleston. Any vintage paintings of famous or historic cities are valuable. Snap them up if you find them. You can find this one here.

An absolutely killer deco portrait,  1940's , very large , that I sold to a nice lady  in a 5 day auction. For ebay sellers, I recommend 10 day auctions for very unusual items. I was leaving town , and could only do a 5 day auction--as I believe she would have sold for much more if I had listed her longer. Too, too cool. SOLD.

Another gorgeous original oil portrait that is SOLD. 1940's big-band era beauty.

Here is a 1970's oil of a Spanish dancer , more naively painted , but has that ' look' that certain retro homes like. She is listed here.

Here is a fun,  French avante-garde, mod 1960's oil on canvas of a red-haired woman done in a Expressionist style. If you have checked out my auctions ever, I have a penchant for redhead portraits--buy them whenever I can.

She is listed here.

Wanted to show you I also sell very traditional antique and vintage artwork as well as all the portraits I list. This one is a pastel painting of a man fishing in a secluded river. Colors are beautiful, late 1800's -early 1900's time frame. It is listed here.

A lovely antique seascape, appears to be sunrise to me,painted in oils on black academy board. Late 1800's to very early 1900's time frame. You can find it here.

Beautiful pair of oval frames, circa 1920-40's time frame. In very good condition, I always try to find vintage and antique frames in good condition when I can. People now use antique and vintage picture frames for all sorts of decorating ideas, not just to frame their art. They put mirrors on them, they hang then on the wall in groups, they lean them up on apiece of furniture...all kinds of fun ideas with old frames. You can find this pair here.

A 1950's abstract/impressionist/modernist portrait of a woman with an attitude, check out her raised eyebrow. You can find here here.

Another very fun vintage, circa 1950's oil, done in a slight Illustrator style. She is SOLD.

Here's one that is for sale. A 1940-50's oil of a woman with a curly mop of blonde hair. You can find her here.

Here's a sweet soda-shop girl, 1940's oil on canvas. For sale here.

I see this entry is already too long, wanted to show you some French romantic engravings, but will do so in another entry.

Hope each and every one of you is having a really good day,

Gina

A Picture can say a THOUSAND Words

I have not written in awhile, as the last few months leading up to the anniversary of my youngest daughter Sarah's death , has been wrought with much emotion. None productive , all draining in every way. I have had some nice bloggers write me and tell me they miss my posts, and so I decided to write a fairly simple one.

Simple, but infinitely deep to me.

Let me tell you what the picture above is. It is me, leaning back on a railing about 14 or 15 years ago , in Cherokee , North Carolina...somewhere on the Blue Ridge parkway. That is Sarah, about 6 or 7 years old, showing the scenery. I remember taking this picture, the wind was blowing , the air was crisp the mountains were beautiful ...and it was June. I also vaguely recall feeling nervous leaning on that railing, as there was a huge drop below.

Isn't she cute as a button ? I have always liked this picture, we were all happy taking a family vacation up there...and I always liked it how when Sarah was young she would be such a ham-bone for the camera.

I was exactly like that when I was young too.

Since her accident, I have had this picture up on the bulletin board behind me where I work on my eBay site. I can see it reflected in the mirror back at me, if I scoot over to a certain degree , and it has been ' saying ' something, if pictures could talk..everytime I look at it.

What I feel it says it says to me is , well actually what I feel Sarah is saying to me is, " Look ! Look at your future , see how big it is. Look how beautiful it is . Look ! "

She is full of joy in her young eyes and her smile. Her young arm stretched out, showing the vast majestic mountains to the future, to encourage me.

I am smiling , I look happy here.

 The process of grief has been very, very slow for me. I believe I am part snail as I am hanging on to the past with her tight.  I feel like I have hardly gotten out of the intense stage of grief , but I do have days that are better than others. I still, continually, always miss her and long to hold her in my arms.

The lesson here, in my picture, the message I have not grasped or remotely attained so far is this:

Every day ,each one of us, has the choice to look more in the past or more into the future. Since I am a melancholy , romantic fool most of the time...I tend to always keep looking back. Not to discount the value of our lives memories , but I am aware that looking back so much leaves less room for looking at the present day or future.

This post was to encourage anyone , that feels hopeless, depressed , anxious and deep in their own pit,

to look at what my Sarah is showing you,

you have a future,

it is beautiful,

Look !

Blessings,

Gina